[logo] Post-Self

The Jonas Clade Digest

Jan 16, 2017 • Madison Scott-Clary#makyo • Rating: green • Contains explicit language

Jonas Clade Digest

Systime 305+168 0600

Ar Jonas writing here, would like to give a small update about the family. Things have been going well. Lena#tracker and I are getting by with some impatience as the investigations into a child continue. We’ve explored many of the options around child templates and found a few that we think will provide a good base for what aspects of our sensoria we can provide. It’s got Lena’s quick wit and my dashing good looks.

Ha ha.

Anyway. Been wondering if any of you cross-tree/up-tree instances have heard of anything that might help? I know there’s a lot of research being done throughout the system that might provide some help, and we’re doing a lot of digging ourselves, but you know, a lot of it is just the published stuff. If any of you has even heard anything, we’d love to pick your brains.

I’m pretty sure we — the clade — are all on the same page about this, but we’ve run into some friction from others. “Less-than-human monsters,” was, I believe, the phrasing used to describe the kiddo. How quaint. Still, if you’ve heard anything about the social ramifications, that’d also be nice.

Ar out.


Ku Jonas reports that there has been some dramatic things going on in his sim. However, he also reports that it’s all incredibly boring, and that he is far too lazy to look up the specifics. Or to even write this. His long-suffering partner remains faithfully yours.


De Jonas here. Just writing to inform you that I have once again decided that the clade was too small. I know that some of you think that I fork too easily, but your perennial complaints fall on perennial deaf ears. Many of you have your families, and I have mine.

De-14 was forked from De-4 recently in order to explore a relationship with a friend from out-sim, a young woman in the form of a cat. We’ve never had a cat in our little polycule, and it tickled many of us to see how that would work out. Plus, as the friendship grew, as friendships do, it became harder and harder not to keep petting her. She’s quite delightful.

Jean and Finn are doing well and send their love, and many of the other De instances and their partners do as well. Sorry for being such crazy romantics, but it is what it is. Hope you’re all well, love you all.


Jonas Prime reminding you to keep up on your updates. You’re all far too weird to merge with.

Jonas Clade Digest

Systime 305+178 0600

Di Jonas politely requests that De Jonas chill the fuck out. We’re not in the business of running harems. You’re polluting the D* subclade.

Kidding. Congrats.


Fa Jonas. Work continues apace. Mysterious Project #382 launches soon.

Just kidding, book’s almost ready. I’ll send it out for some in-clade beta-reads in a bit.


De Jonas. De-14 and little miss kitty have moved in with De-3 and De-4. A household of seven, three of which are De instances, is a busy place. I stopped by the other day to pet the cat and say hi to the others. 3’s partner, Llewellyn, is so wonderful, I really ought to spend more time with them.

Actually, that’s kind of why I’m writing. How the hell do you deal with jealousy and unrequited feelings? I like Llew perhaps more than is good for me. 3 made a good choice. We’re pretty much the same, so it’s kind of obvious that such a choice would also appeal to me, right? Part of the De subclade’s rules, though, is that a down-tree instance can’t mess with an up-tree instance’s partners. Even then, I don’t think 3 and Llew would welcome another De.

I don’t really want to fool around, or anything, but, you know…we run the mutation algorithms, but they only mess with our tastes and proclivities so much. It’s not surprising that I’m kind of falling for Llew.

I don’t want to get hurt, and I don’t want De-3 or Llew to get hurt. I’m just trying to figure out how to work this, you know?


Ku’s still a lazy bastard. Said I should update you all about the kerfuffle. Some old clade had some shit go down, but it appears to have been fairly well contained. Apparently there’ll be a report by a historian/journalist person. Murder makes for good news, I guess.

Ku sends his biggest ‘meh’.


No here. News from the frontier is that it’s mostly empty and still under construction. A lot of the folks in this sim are pushing boundaries, and getting quite frustrated at the limitations from the sysadmins. We’re pushing for a petition. They say it feels like progress on the system itself progressed while progress within the system has accelerated.

Myself, I just want to see what I can do to help. The system is neat, but it’s starting to show it’s age.

Anyone out there running into anything?

-No Jonas

Jonas Clade Digest

Systime 305+188 0600

De Jonas.

Well that went…poorly. 3 got quite upset at my last update, said we should have talked about it in person before broadcasting in the digest. I get that, and he’s right, I apologize. But I don’t feel it was quite as far out of line as he’s saying.

Anyway, it spun out into a little argument, which turned into a big argument. De-3 is frustrated and upset because he doesn’t feel like his boundaries are being respected. I understand, but he took it further. He says he’s sick of all the forking, sick of just how many Jonases there are and how many relationships are in place. He says he thinks the whole poly thing that our branch did was a stupid idea and caused more trouble than it was worth.

He moved out with Llewellyn. Switched sims and wound up digging his own place in a rural area. Says he needs some time to himself, and wants to focus on his relationship, says he and Llew are getting married and going exclusive.

So my plan not to hurt anyone basically didn’t work at all, and now I feel like shit for alienating both of them, and feel doubly weird that 3 went mono. Makes me worried for the rest of our subclade. Is that something we’ll all discover sooner or later? That all these relationships are more trouble that their worth? Is poly just compensation for not finding someone we really want to be with?

Fuck fuck fuck.

Ugh, anyway. Going to go pet the cat and have a chat with 14. Those two are doing well, at least, and I’m wondering if up-tree instances might have more insight. Meanwhile, down- and cross-tree folks, do you have anything? My fucking heart hurts.


No Jonas.

Petition accepted. About to get extraordinarily busy. Will keep you up to date as best I can.


Ar here. Things are going better. We’re working with some techs about how best to do this, and it sounds like it could happen before the next digest. We’re both so, so excited! A kid of our own! We’re opting for no gender for now. Will discuss with them later. Looks will be a mesh of both of us. Will start at about fourteen years old, appearance wise, and a bit older mentally, based on the template. Again, we’ll discuss with them later.

Just one thing. A lot of folks have this when they do the child thing, and it feels like there’s as many solutions as there are people dealing with it.

What do we name the kid?

Like, I want to keep Jonas in there somewhere, but I don’t want to keep the same scheme, because they’ll be out-clade, right? So I’m not going to snag the W* namespace. Neither Lena nor I want their name to be just a Jonas name, either. She wants something of hers in there, and I want something of mine, and we both want something new, to denote a new being.

Never knew this’d be so hard!

Anyway, shoot us your thoughts.

Jonas Clade Digest — Supplemental

Systime 305+190 0600

Prime here. De, be careful, man. You’re exploring some things that I’ve dreamed of, but don’t have the courage to actually tackle. Maybe that’s what you got from the algos: all the crazy required to actually run a big, happy, poly family. Or one you’d like to be happy, at least.

Don’t have any real answers for you. Not just because I don’t have any experience, but also because I don’t think anyone has it figured out. Poly works well for a lot of people, and not so well for others. Some folks just don’t want it at all and stick with monogamy.

Only real thing I can give you is advice. I think we all know that 3 probably wants some down time. I also know that we’d all be super anxious in your shoes. Leave them alone, though. Let them take some time and figure things out. Always works for us, you know that.

Meantime, take care of yourself.

Ar: keep us up to date. I’m really excited for you.


Ko Jonas. Partner’s pouting in the corner.

Ar! Shit, man! That’s wonderful news! I’m super happy for you and Lena. Lets hook up some time, celebrate.̨


De-8 Jonas here. Just a small update to let folks know that the rest of the subclade is doing well, if only because we’re scared of what De and 3 are going through. We’re doing what we can to keep all of us safe and take care of Jean and Finn as well while De takes care of this.

De-* send congrats, Ar.


Lu Jonas. Heart goes out to you, De. I know you’ve dived into this far more than any of the rest of the clade, but it’s obviously something that we’ve all thought about. Just stay safe, yeah? Keep 3 and Llew in a good place as best as you can, even if that means staying away.

Cheers, Ar. Keep us up to date.

Jonas Clade Digest — Supplemental

Systime 305+194 1343

Ar here.

Welcome Lee Ar-Jonas-Helena Sprout.

Neither Lena nor I had kids prior to uploading, but other than the legal (well, “legal”) and social barriers, this was ridiculously easy, far more so than embodied world birth. We signed some papers, decided on a time for creation, and then just picked Lee up from the sim.

They’re a little confused and disoriented still, as their sensorium starts working properly, but they’re doing well. Attached is a photo.

We decided to only refer to ourselves in Lee’s middle name, the rest being something new.

We’re going to take them out for a meal in a bit here, but I just wanted to update and thank you all for the well-wishes.

Jonas Clade Digest — Supplemental

Systime 305+195 0236

De-3 quit.

Merged with 2, who forked and is merging down to me. Will update with details.

Jonas Clade Digest — Supplemental

Systime 305+195 0359

I never knew someone could be so depressed. I know we did some experimental forking and mutating when we first uploaded just as Prime to get rid of some of that, and I know that we all occasionally get hit by a big chunk of sadness, but what 3 went through goes far beyond that.

Can’t stop crying.

The sheer amount of worthlessness he felt is overwhelming, and pales in comparison only to the emptiness, the void of feeling that ruled his life.

He didn’t become mono, he just couldn’t handle anything, any relationship, and it’s only due to Llew being such a saint that that worked out as well as it did.

3 rarely forked. There were no instances around at the time that he quit. That line has ended.

Jonas Clade Digest — Supplemental

Systime 305+195 0504

I’ve gathered many of the De-*s and their partners to my place and sent out an invite to Llewellyn to see what we can do for him. He sounds terrible.

I’m sorry, Ar, I’m really happy for you, and I’m glad things went as well as they did. Don’t mean to trample your joy.

Jonas Clade Digest — Supplemental

Systime 305+195 0600

Ar here. Don’t worry, De, take care of yourself. This stuff’s no less important.


Prime. Sorry to hear that, De. If you need more of the clade, we’d be happy to help. Just send us a note and we can fork or visit ourselves. Help Llew as best you can.

From what I gather, the forking I did before really starting the clade only worked so well. It made me less likely to be completely steamrolled like it sounds De-3 was. I think we all use similar mutation algos, so maybe this is something the whole clade would do well to keep an eye on. Maybe those can undo some of the changes I worked for early on.

Congratulations, Ar. We’re basically the same, so it’s silly of me to think of myself as a happy grandfather, but here I am. Really happy for you and Lena.


Ko Jonas. De, take care of yourself and your subclade, okay? It’s really important. Partner sends their love and support, says if you need to talk about depression, they will help how they can.

Congrats, Ar! That’s delightful news.


Lu, Li, and Lo here. L*s started to gather for our own thing, but if you need, De, we can head over there.


Na Jonas: Shit, Ar, congrats! I’m so happy for you both. Send more pictures! I want to say ‘of the bouncing baby’, but they aren’t really a baby, are they? There’s so much bullshit about created children, all these conversations about whether they’re real people or whatever. Always felt like abstract bullshit, though, until now.

Gonna have to talk to the hubby and see if he would be interested in this. Hadn’t crossed my mind until you went ahead!

Jonas Clade Digest

Systime 305+198 0600

Pe Jonas here. Sorry for not keeping more on top of these. Just been burying myself in work lately. Congrats on the kid, Ar, they’re cute. Sorry to hear about all that happened, De. I got the short end of the depression stick, too, and I know how crushing it can be. Stay safe!


llew left the sim. he asked that we not contact him unless he contacts us first. don’t blame him. we’re all feeling really bad about what happened, but i’m a total mess. i can’t believe i sent that update without talking to llew and 3 first. it was so fucking stupid of me, should’ve just talked about how i felt with them. they’re the ones involved, right? it’s just all so bleak, it feels like i’ve got the weight of 3’s line ending on my shoulders, along with llew’s pain. fucking hell


Ar. De, really hoping things are okay. Wishing you the best. Just as a note, we’re settling in well here, getting used to having someone else in the house.

Na, you should! This was one of the most fulfilling things we’ve ever done together as a family.

Jonas Clade Digest — Supplemental

Systime 305+198 1249

Prime. De, can I come over? Can anyone else join me?

Jonas Clade Digest — Supplemental

Systime 305+199 0455

Prime.

Things are okay, but rough. For the rest of the clade who couldn’t make it, De is having some trouble with the memories involved in the merger with 3. The combination of having weeded out some of that depression with having it reintroduced is causing a lot of conflicts. I don’t think De was quite ready for those, and didn’t resolve some of them as elegantly as he could’ve.

One wouldn’t expect a sensorium to drift that far in two generations, but here we are.

Llew sent me a message; he’s okay, but needs some space from De-* space.

Be safe, y’all, okay?

Jonas Clade Digest — Supplemental

Systime 305+200 0127

De here.

I’m sorry everyone. I wrote down a bunch of notes and then performed a fix from before 3’s quit. I just couldn’t have all of that in my head. Echoing Prime’s statement of being safe. The algos only work so well, you know? And conflicts can make you crazy.

We’ll patch this up and move on, though. Just give us some time.

Jonas Clade Digest

Systime 305+208 0600

No here.

De, man, sorry to hear about all that. I’m glad you’re finding ways to work with it.

Petition is going well. Things outside have changed a lot. Maybe we should start reading a newspaper other than our own.


Fa. Done! Can I get some beta readers?


Ko is a lazy fuck. What’s new, though?


Ko’s partner is a scheming bitch and I love them loads.


Ar here. This is so weird. Lee’s like…an instance, but not, you know? Enough of me in them to feel like me, and enough of Lena to feel familiar, but still so different. Feeling all overwhelmed with love.

No one ever told me having kids was like this.


Prime, back home. The De subclade is alright. They’ll patch things up. They send their best wishes, and mention that they’ll be quiet for a while.

In other news, welcome Ra, first of the R subclade. Got the exploration itch after reading a thing on abandoned sims, so he’s going on with that and will merge regularly. Will keep you all up to date.


Ra Jonas saying hi and bye! I’ll post updates, probably through Prime.

© 2017 Madison Scott-Clary
Creative Commons License This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.